Old Habits

I live
in the illusion,
dearer than
my thousand truths
But deep inside,
tells me a voice,
There is no substance
To back this lie.

I have been seeing things
The way my heart willed to.
Shutting the truth out,
Hoping for a miracle,
out of blue.

 Pent up breath,
The ache,
at the base of the heart,
Tentative smile,
Sadly, but, a practiced art.

Frayed belief,
forlorn hope.
Something, but,
still sparks in my heart.
Don’t they say,
old habits die hard

Many Dreams Later

I wonder,
Whatever happened to the wish
That I had tucked under my pillow.
Did it just die,or,
Float away to sky.
Or, it became a star,
That winks at me from afar,as
I get ready
For another sleepless night?

Standing a little apart from me,
Life looks at me askance.
Seeing through my pretense
Knowing I don't stand a chance
And I carry on
Nonchalant,
With my lifeless existence.

The silver foil comes apart,
Bit by bit.
My quasi perfect world
Stands naked.
The fears were never unfounded.
Many dreams later,
Many wishes after,
I find myself grounded..

The Pause...

The pause,
Stretching beyond eternity.
Hollow, silent,barren
My doubts echoing against its walls.

You cant find much to say,
But your restless fingers,
Drumming incessently
On the table between us,
Have some to convey.

A silent spell screams loud,
I rush to gather some words
Inane,meaningless,
Like empty calories feeding the soul

We look around
Everywhere, but at each other.
Dull, insipid pictures,
Forming a collage that
Fails to stir us.

You hum a songless tune
And I just fight my restless sighs.
We both dodge the inevitable
Senseless efforts to while time

I brace myself,
To meet the evasive eyes
You ask me no truth,my dear
I promise to tell you no lies.

Yes,I shall tell no lies!